The Loop Guide to Clubbing, Drinking, plus West Essex and East London living.

If you’ve read many posts on The Loop Forum you’ll probably of stumbled across the monster that is Ignorant C**t. Part man, part beast, he trawls the forum in between Tequilas and katzu curries. Caroline decided it was time to hear his story…

1. When did you come across the loop and how?

I had just started a new job and didn’t have work email to speak to a mate yet so he told me about the loop so I popped on to chat to him then found my little cousin going on there. Got abused by these two old fat men so finally signed up and Ignorant C**t was born

2. How long have you been a Looper?

Its actually coming up to my 1st birthday as a looper. Its been an eventful year, full of ups and downs and some 18,000 plus (and some very memorable) posts

3. What do like best about the loop?

I like the fact that the majority of the females on there are as dumb as they come and go over quicker than del boy in a posh wine bar.

4. Who would you say is your favourite Looper past or present and why?

As neo said there are many that could step up to take this title… KF cos he was the only one who really understood me, veiga as underneath the excess bagels he is quite amusing but there can only be one man… my old adversary, Mr. Prada Prince… this man went from being my enemy to a close and trusted friend, now more of a mentor… he was also the man behind the One Night in Rockys stories which il never forget

5. If you had to be stuck in a lift with a Looper for a whole day, who would you choose?

Im gonna say Taryn. She is a genuinely nice person who makes me laugh, is good company and not a bad lot. Plus it would absolutely kill Sharkie cos he would wanna know what me and his cousin have done to pass the time for 24 hours

6. Did you make a conscious decision to turn from most hated to most loved!

No not at all, it just seemed to have crept up on me. Im not too fussed whether im loved or hated, I think deep down most of the ones that hated me just realised that nights out with the big dog were the way forward and that they either joined ranks and liked me or risked getting kicked up the arse next time I saw them

7. Ever snogged another Looper?

Well a true gentleman never tells but then I never pretend to be a true gentleman… however there are some I think quite a bit of so wont name them… I will say its easily double figures

8. Have you ever had a relationship with a Looper

No. Im not in the right frame of mind to be having relationships as my last one culminated in me kicking her from a moving car then nearly needing an injucntioc order on her… but im back in the ratrace now so who knows… maybe Caroline, me & you, bel sit, some rose… it just might happen

9. Biggest row with a Looper that has made you want to smash your computer?

One day I logged on to see that the loops own beanstalk climbing Ogre, Tucker D had changed his avator so that it was now a pic of him smooching with my little cousin…. The red mist hit me hard that day

10. Where do you work?

Im a clerk for a traders on the LME but this is only till I win the lottery. I have this recurring dream that I win £9.6m and trust me il be even more louder and flasher than I am now

11. Have they ever commented on how much looping you’ve been doing?

Yes very recently it came to light that I was on this website for an average of 38 hours per week… I had no defence

12. Have you ever gone in as another user, just to abuse someone?

Who would do such a sad thing like that? Ok yes fair enough. As this is all about clearing my demons il admit to some characters… With the help of various M7 wingmen we had such characters as EVIL C**T, Reggie Kray, Joshua, SarahK, Cassie, x Emma x etc… It was just so easy on here. On the Monday morning the orange brigae would say things like “right that’s it, no more” and by Friday they would be going all chicken oriental cos we had fooled them again

13. Which Looper do you wish would quit looping and why? Be honest!

I don’t want anyone to leave the loop. Its merely a way of passing the time of day and I think too many people take it too seriously, too many grasses and complete nut jobs on there.

14. Which Looper were you must surprised by when you met them?

Again a few shocked me… The Boss I thought was a total pillock, hence the reason I made the Boss Is Orange myspace account, but he turned out to be a nice bloke who ive shared a few beers with and no doubt will again, Prada and Gucci I thought were both big sufferers of Little Man Syndrome and they both turned out to be nice blokes, I even went through a stage of being stalked by Gucci where he would chase me through Bank station screeching at me like a banshee and trying to hit me on the arse with his rolled up metro but the biggest shock… Caroline. For months she agged me with her “delete that picture” or “delete that post”, her annoying smileys etc and then that fateful night in 195 she tried charming me and I realised she was quite a sort and a really nice girl. Our friendship has just grown and grown

15. Why did you change your name?

I personally believe that Mrs Loop Admin knew that Armageddon was near and that me and Fiddler were about to take the loop down in our quest for world domination so forced us to change our names. I then went to Sir IC the Invincible (as I truly am), then to Sir IC, then IC… this was all because I was getting agged having to type long sentences out just to sign in…. then I decided the change of name had changed me as a loop so Ignorant was reborn

16. Who would you say is the funniest Looper on the forum?

You mean other than all the spurs fans who truly believed they were gonna be better than the mighty gooners this year? Im gonna pick 3. Neo as he is just a true talent and wasted working for the smartie company, Prada as his lyrical talent belongs in FHM and gave me so many laughs with his songs and little stories (my mum still has a copy of “My Visit to the IC Household stuck to her fridge) and my main man Joey D… extremely dry, very witty and completely on my level of humour… he knows why

17. Do you think you’ll ever stop Looping?

I cant see it can you? For every season that passes in the OC, there is another batch of fresh 18 year olds joining the loop, no doubt some will be spotted by my talent spotter Disco Dave or il have Gucci emailing me saying take these goons down so no, I can never see me leaving the loop

18. And finally.. (Courtesy of Caroline) if you could bring back one person who doesn’t come on the loop anymore for whatever reason who would it be?

Kiddie Fiddler without a doubt. The only man to be banned from the loop 3 times. My trusted wingman over the past 3 years, he has been there with me through thick and thin, whether it be drunken womanising, verbal abuse of some poor soul or just being the Goose to my Maverick… I miss having this mans comments under mine. Ive actually supplied a pic of the two of us to show how we roll