The Loop Guide to Clubbing, Drinking, plus West Essex and East London living.

Oh Soooo its been yet another crazy crazy month for Miss Essex and The City, not only was it the debut of Bamboozle (the secret TV show that I have been filming for what seems like forever) But I also have a new and exciting job, now I don’t want to say to much as I am on a trial and if I end up not getting it then I will look like a wally wombat! So for now all I will say that it’s very exciting, it’s exactly what I want to do and most importantly its fun fun fun!

Right I haven’t been out loads due to the run up to Christmas it’s too cold and I have to get up at 5am for my new job but I still allowed time for the odd rampage! I swear though Christmas gets earlier every year and once again I am as disorganised as ever, not like my friend and business partner (remember the party design company: For all your party planning needs) Ellie McOrganised! I swear she must have got her presents in August, they are all wrapped up and distributed AND she’s sent all her cards! I haven’t even started wearing a coat yet and I still have some cards to send from last year!

Anyway along with this and four of my closet friends deciding it would be good to be born within the same two weeks, my life lately has been v hectic but as I said I always make room for a rampage! The first was a trip to the Ice bar last Thursday for Natalie’s Birthday, basically it’s a bar that is made completely of ice and no I am not insulting your intelligence, I thought you might (as I did) think that it was just a cool name for a bar, get it! Anyway it’s completely made of ice, the ceiling, the walls, the bar and even the glasses! and they give you these massive silver fur lined gowns and gloves to wear and if you’ve ever seen ‘Dude where’s my car’ then think ‘zoltan’, I felt the need to do that every 5 minutes while there. The drinks were pure vodka so it definitely warmed the cockles and after I licked the rude part of the ice sculpture, couldn’t feel my toes and had loooadddss of pictures taken ‘zoltan’ style it was time to go outside into the warm! Then on to The Living Room, it’s a new bar in the west end and its lovely! You must go there although I was pretty disappointed with the lack of clocks there……Girls!

So that was Nat’s and the following Saturday it was a proper family affair, there was 12 of us all cousins (or partners of cousins) me, Dan, my bro and step sis and we all went to my uncle’s new restaurant in Brookmans Park called Nolita’s. They own Bar Italia in Soho and Little Italy and this is their latest venture! It was wonderful, it is one of the nicest places I have ever been (I know I am bias) but it is! Not only is the food amazing but you can dance in there it shuts when it shuts and the service is impeccable. Apparently at about 8pm my cousin came over and said that someone called up and said ‘have you got a table for 4’ which they didn’t as it’s a Saturday night and you need to book at least two weeks in advance – anyway the person on the phone said, would it help if I told you it was the Beckhams and my cousin said ‘not really’ and put the phone down! How cool is that! At least he turned down the Beckhams!

To be fair we would have made room for them on our table and we wouldn’t have been put out, Posh could have nibbled on a bread stick and David, well he could have a nibble of whatever he liked! Anyway we had a great time and as always my cousins made it their mission to get us all so drunk with shots of grapper and B52’s so needless to say the night did end with me crying, hormonally over…. well… something.. I can’t even remember what! I woke up to that embarrassing feeling as soon as my eyes pinged open on Sunday morning and I had the hump with Dan but annoyingly I couldn’t remember why so I just played along with it for a while and then things went back to normal, but let me just tell you, you know you’re drunk when your brother says ‘you were well drunk last night’ this from the person we call ‘the limp wrist kid’ because after two beers he sways and spills his drink like he’s standing on a moving boat.

Anyway come Tuesday I was over the embarrassment and the shame and decided that is was time to think about Christmas presents, so once I’d made the list of things I wanted I turned my attention to other people. I swear last year I was brilliant and grinned along with the rest of the smug well prepared people, but this year I am soo busy I am going to have to settle with a whiz up the West End on Christmas Eve. No doubt with the queues, tourists and too much choice in Oxford Circus this is guaranteed to truly dampen my Christmas spirit, baa humbug! What is the best way to Christmas shop though? People say that the internet, I did it like that last year and yes it certainly took out the hassle but it also zapped a lot of the fun away, it was a bit too easy! Maybe I just love to punish my self with all the stress and hype I suppose it adds to Christmas doesn’t it? Although this does mean you get a bigger come down when it’s all over so maybe an easy ‘subtle’ Christmas is better?

God I am miserable you wouldn’t believe that I actually love Christmas and what’s not to love! You’ve got great feel good films on TV all the time, Santa Claus the movie, Home alone, Scrooge, Love Actually and many, many more. The food is plentiful and everyone has a sudden obsession with ‘nibbles’ you’re guaranteed to be well fed if you ‘pop’ in anywhere plus they are more than likely to have alcohol ‘for Christmas’! Everyone spends countless hours decorating their house, front door and trees, people smile more, go to the theatre and have more parties. Everyone releases their best single/book or dirty calendar; the kids break up from school thus making it easy to manoeuvre through West Essex without fear of road crush from one of the many pointless jeeps that usually litter our streets through term time. You get a chocolate every morning and don’t feel bad because ‘its Christmas’, and you are guaranteed at least one stroke of luck in the way of a cracker and if you don’t win then chances are if the party is at your house then you will end up with the presents anyway! So on that note Merry Christmas to you All!

P.S I had colonic again last week and it was better than I remembered I have such a flat tummy and I swear I don’t seem to be able to consume as much! I love it!

P.P.S Eggnog and Ginger Latte’s in Starbucks are wicked.

P.P.P.S I am not happy about the KFC in Loughton, No more neon lighting in our town please! It’s staring to look like Bangkok minus the lady boys and if you’re wondering where they were - Blue Mondays Sunday night!